Courtney's Corner: Bad Days

Hello everyone and welcome to another Courtney's Corner segment. Before we begin I understand that I promised an IMVU-related entry this week and obviously I did not deliver. I have one I was going to post today but after the last couple of days in my personal life, my work life, and with friends I have decided there is something I need to take the time to discuss. That is ...

---

Bad Days. Unfortunately most people these days experience Bad Days. Actually, everyone experiences a bad day in one way or another. It is something that we all have to, unfortunately, go through. There are different levels of bad days and for this one, I would like to focus on the worse spectrum of them.

Currently, I have a friend that is going through a bad time. He seems to be spiraling and it is very worrisome. If you know him, you would know he doesn't get this way usually. I'm trying to send him words of encouragement maybe a picture or two of my kittens just because I know he loves them. I just now realized I never shared my babies with you guys ...

The one on the left is my little girl, her name is Cheetos. The one on the right is my little boy, his name is Chester. They are twin orange kittens who are currently 7 months old. They are my absolute babies and they make every bad day so much better. I don't know where I would be without them. Actually, I do, I probably wouldn't be alive.

Not many people know this and definitely no one online, but a couple of months ago I was extremely depressed and suicidal. It was from the span of about May 2022 to September 2022. I was struggling so hard with so much stuff going on in my real life. I had started a new relationship even though I wasn't over my last ( I know my mistake on that one) and on top of that decision within that time frame from about May to July that I would move away from my apartment an extra hour away, which meant two hours away from my family. I would get a new job. Completely start over and have no time to process anything. While dealing with the fact that my now ex-boyfriend had his kids living next door. His mother-in-law lived next door and for a short period, his wife (yes you heard me correctly) lived with us. Now I'm not going to go into every single detail of what happened just that it was a lot to take on and in a short amount of time. In July I got burned by a firework, his kids moved in full-time, and I had to balance working a midnight shift while taking care of a house, a relationship, and kids. During all of this, I was struggling even just him and me, I was struggling. I can't exactly tell you why, maybe it was the uncertainty of everything, I don't know. However, I will tell you that my panic attacks and mental breakdowns were happening at least once a week if not more. I was on the verge of ending it all. I couldn't handle everything and I definitely couldn't handle myself. My boyfriend at the time wasn't any help either. Every time we got into a fight he would throw my mental issues into my face. Eventually, he came up with the idea of getting me a pet. A pet to call my own. Then in June Chester and Cheetos came along. All though I still struggled and even, unfortunately, had suicidal thoughts I had them there to help me. In short, words that aren't exactly short, they saved me.

That isn't what this blog entry is for though. All though they have a part in it they aren't the actual topic. The topic is bad days. Sorry I got off on a ramble. Thinking about bad days and then mentioning my baby meows made me think of my worse days. As you can see I know my fair share of bad days so when I see someone else, especially a friend of mine struggling with his it upsets me. All though I know how to deal with my own, for the most part, and I know what they are and such I don't know how to help anyone overcome theirs. It is something I need to work on.

Today for me at work, was a bad day. Grant it I still love my job, but I definitely wasn't pleased with it today. There were so many mistakes and things that went wrong today and it just scrambled me. It didn't help I didn't feel like going to work today. I wasn't feeling good; nauseous, and tired, and my stomach hurt beyond words. Going to work wasn't exactly on my to-do list when I woke up. However, I woke up, I got dressed in a cute outfit, I did my makeup the way I liked it, I had my half cup of orange juice and I went and did it because I knew deep down I wanted to I just needed a little extra encouragement today. However, when I got there I couldn't exactly focus all that well. I ended up doing things out of character and yes I had someone get after me or at least send me a warning about it. Simply put, I was on my phone way too much this morning. My phone had an update and because I am still in training and the trainer was doing her own thing, including answering her own phone and doing things I didn't need to learn. I figured I would just update my phone and answer my messages. I will get on my phone at work. Everyone has their phone out and oddly enough the woman who warned me against it is honestly on her phone the most. I watched her just the other day spend an hour on a phone call with what I would assume was her partner, which definitely doesn't seem work-related. She also uses work time to answer calls for her other business... yikes. However, I definitely was on my phone way too much today. Usually, I will look at my phone and answer messages whenever I have a free moment. Whenever my trainer steps away, or just to look at the time of it. Today, however, I had spent at least a good half an hour on it in little bursts but still. Half an hour when I was only at work for an hour and a half is bad no matter how you look at it. Now of course being human I was mad she corrected me for it. Kept thinking to myself how the person who is always on her phone has the audacity to yell at me about it when I have seen pretty much everyone take personal calls while at work and so on. However, that doesn't make what I did any less wrong.

On top of that, I finally got to go off on my own and do my own thing, which by that time I had a bunch of things I needed to get done and not nearly enough time to do it all. When I finally got to do my own thing for the most part everything went smoothly. However, there were a couple of times when things got messed up and I had to ask for help to fix it. The thing was it wasn't even my doing. However, the people that messed up no longer worked there so I got in trouble for it. Or at least I got blamed for it because I mean when in doubt just blame the new girl apparently. All I needed to do though was to take a deep breath, and remember that not all days will be good. There will be bad days at work just as there will be good days at work. That is just how it is with life. Not every day will be a winner. You know the funny part is I did that and the day got better. I know at the end of the day I have a job I love. I have someone at home who loves me and supports me. I have two young happy kittens that love and support me. So I am good. I am content. Will that mean my depression and anxiety will disappear? No. It just means my good days are more enjoyable because I know that all exist. It doesn't last forever and although I have a hard time remembering that as all people do when they are at their lowest it is something that always rings true.

I would love to hear your tips and tricks to get over your bad days. Tell me down in the comments below about your bad days and how you get over them. I am interested in learning about you all and opening up a conversation. I hope one day we can all be one big community. I feel like that is the end of this entry. I'm not sure I got anywhere productive and I am not even sure I made sense. To be honest, I am not sure about anything. I do know I feel better. A weight I didn't know was on my shoulders has now lifted. I am happy.

Until Next Time.

Stay True Stay You Stay Stylish ♡